Adventures at the Park

So it wouldn't be a normal Andria S day if I didn't have some sort of random crazy drama happen around here. So yesterday I thought I'd take the boys to the park to feed the ducks at the lake before we had a late morning doctor appt. (Both boys have been congested for awhile and I wanted to make sure ears, etc were good to go before we fly out to North Carolina this week). So we get to the park and we cruise over to the lake. Aidan was loving it and so excited to feed the ducks. So I do what any proud mom would do, and pull out the camera. Except that as I'm pulling it out of my pocket and trying to turn it on with one hand and restrain my son from throwing himself in the lake with the ducks with the other hand, I DROPPED the camera. And the camera bounced and went PLOP right into the LAKE.

So I do what any rational mother would do. I say a few choice words that I hope my sons don't remember and then I start calling my husband and closest friends to see what they would do. There's no one around to help and I can't find any sticks to try and test how deep the water is. I'm really not wanting to climb into the lake. It's green, murky, and filled with duck poop. Who knows what diseases are floating around in it. But we did come to feed the ducks, so I decide to think about what to do and finish feeding the ducks with my son. It's definitely worth trying to retrieve the camera since it is shock proof and water proof and probably survived the trip to the bottom of the lake. So after we finish feeding the ducks I decide to take a walk through the park and maybe we'll come across a maintenance worker or a stick... someone or something that can help. Oh, you might have wondered where Colin was during all of this... sound asleep in the stroller chilling in the shade of course.

Well we walk for a bit. I find no one and nothing to help so we walk back to the scene of the accident and I make the monumental decision to GO IN THE LAKE. I make sure the stroller is in the shade and Aidan is strapped in tight. Then I give him a snack to keep him occupied before I roll my shorts up, sit on the cement ledge next to the lake, and gingerly put my feet in the water. I slowly lower them until I feel the bottom of the lake and felt thankful for two things. One, the water only went up to my knees and Two, the bottom of the lake was cement and I did not have to put my feet in slimy, yucky mud. I spend about 10 minutes "sweeping" the ground in the area where the camera went in. I walked back and forth shuffling my feet along the bottom slowing working my way from the ledge out and from left to right. Eventually I had to give up my search because we did have a doctor's appt to get to and I never did find the camera. I lifted myself back out of the lake and proceeded to use probably half a package of wipes to clean my legs off and then slathered them in hand sanitizer.

I was so annoyed that I actually went in the lake and still didn't retrieve the camera. I should have just jumped in right away when I dropped it and knew exactly where it went. But I think I needed the 20 minutes or so to talk myself into my adventure in the lake. Aidan of course thought it was just grand that his mommy went in the lake... hopefully he doesn't remember this and try to take his own adventure in the lake the next time we go!

Here's a few pictures I took with my phone after the camera took the dive!

Telling the story. Telling my story.

So with all the blogging and social networking that has such a prevalent place in our lives today, it can be easy to share "too much". And believe it or not, I have tried to be more cognizant about how much I do share. Which is why when I wrote my post the day Ian left I debated for over an hour over whether or not I should hit the publish button. And since, I've argued with myself over whether I should leave it on there or not, constantly asking myself "Did I share too much?" Then tonight I read this quote...

"Whoever survives a test, whatever it may be, must tell the story. That is his duty." by Elie Wiesel.

And I know I'm not a holocaust survivor, and I know that what I'm going through is something countless other wives and families have already been through. But this is my test. And at the end of the day and each subsequent day until this year is over, there is a story to tell. It is my story. It is our family's story. And I hope that one day this blog still exists in some form so that I can share it with the boys and they can read all about our story during this time.

Life goes on

Well it's been over a week now and we're surviving! We're staying pretty busy and that has definitely helped a lot. I am so thankful to my friends that have been helping, either by bringing us meals to make my life easier, or by helping watch one kiddo so I could take the other one to the doctor, or just inviting us over for playdates so we have a fun day. We are so lucky to have such amazing people in our life! It has been a very busy week and I feel like I have gotten so much accomplished. One of the highlights of our week was getting our trip to North Carolina to visit Ian at the end of the month all booked. We'll spend about a week in Charlotte with Ian's sister, Erin, and her family, and Ian will come up and visit with us over the weekend. Then we'll head over to Camp Lejeune for a couple days before we steal Daddy for the 4th of July weekend and go to Myrtle Beach. Then we head back to Camp Lejeune and fly back home. Obviously we're really looking forward to the trip!

The boys are adjusting to Daddy being gone. Colin is so little, I doubt he even gets that anything different is going on. Aidan is having a harder time. Definitely more temper tantrums and he talks about Daddy a lot and asks for him to come home. We try to talk to Daddy a lot and Skyping seems to help. Aidan loves looking at pictures of his Daddy, so I made him a photo book of pictures of Daddy, Colin and him so that the boys have something that they can hold and look at.

Each day gets a little easier as we get settled in our new routine and life goes on.

So what else is new around the Sharp household?

Well Aidan is now two and is very independent and stubborn (does that surprise anyone?) He loves going to school and doing activities and playing with his friends. We are in the early stages of potty training and my goal is to have him potty trained by the time I go back to work (but we're not stressing it. When he's ready, it'll happen). He loves "helping", cars, trains, reading, and puzzles. He's learning his colors and numbers and he amazes me every day with how much he knows and understands.

Colin is 7 months tomorrow and is on the move! He can crawl, sit, can stand with support, and is starting to pull himself up on things. He loves being cuddled and doing whatever big brother is doing. Now that he's finally over the RSV, bronchiolitus, and a gastrointestinal virus he's such a happy little thing. He had a rough start with the GI issues from birth and being sick pretty much nonstop for the last three and a half months, but his personality is finally starting to come out and he loves smiling and laughing. He's also a big "talker" and lets us know exactly what's on his mind. I'm hopeful that now that he's finally feeling better we can get him on a better feeding schedule and that he'll start sleeping through the night.

Things are pretty much the same for me. School ended up a few weeks ago. I was really pleased with how my students did. I was hoping that something part time would work out at school for next year, but at this point, it looks like I'll be returning full time. It'll keep me busy, but hopefully not too busy that I'm overly stressed. I have been working on photo projects this summer and getting the house organized. It is definitely time for some major purging!

Well mommie duties call! I'll try to get some new photos uploaded on here soon!

D Day

So when I changed the link for the blog awhile back, my intention was to change the focus from it being a baby blog to just a blog about our life. Most days we are loving life. Today I don't think that title fits. Today is the day that we have been building up to over the past year. This morning we got up nice and early and had some last minute family time and then the boys and I took Daddy to the airport and he has officially deployed.

We are officially a deployed family.

As if saying goodbye at the airport was hard enough, I thought my heart would break when I was dropping the boys off at day care later this morning and Aidan told me "Daddy gone." So let's be honest. It's pretty much taking everything I have to keep it all together today and it most definitely isn't a day where "the S's are loving life".

When I look back over the past week or so, I feel really guilty. I spent so much time being angry. Not angry with my husband. Not angry with the boys. But angry with life. Angry that my husband, my boys' daddy, my best friend, was leaving. Leaving me. Leaving us. Leaving me to do all this on my own. And I know it's not his fault. But I was angry. And that anger was making me withdraw and close off. And I get that it's normal to feel like that. But I feel guilty now. I should have been nicer. I should have been more loving. I should have been more patient.

So as we move forward I am letting go of that anger and promising myself to just be the best mom, the best wife, the best friend I can be. My family comes first and there are two precious little boys who are depending on me to make everything all right. I am strong. We are strong. And when this is all over, we will be even stronger.

In the meantime I'll do my best to keep this blog updated. On us and on Daddy, too.

And maybe tomorrow the S's will be loving life again.